10 Random Poker Quotes

• Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• "I could make a crazy call on you..." Sammy Farhah to Chris Moneymaker at the final table when Moneymaker went all in.
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.