10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• Seldom do the lambs slaughter the butcher. -Amarillo Slim
• "Hooks (pair of Jacks) are for Fish. You've got to flop 'em, fold 'em, or fornicate 'em." Johnnie Moss
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger