10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I suck, therefore I suck out. North Shore Mike
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)