10 Random Poker Quotes

• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• Take me to the river. Wash me in the water.
• Playing poker for play money is like going to a strip club for the food. -UncleWaldo
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• The best feeling in the world if flopping the nut straight against two players acting before you who both flopped sets. I'll take my chances against 5 outs.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• "Poker is just like the fucking universe man, the different combinations and outs are infinite so it's pointless racking your mind about bad beats and shit" Stephen Morris
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.