10 Random Poker Quotes

• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• "I already messed this hand up pretty good, so I may as well call." Chris Ferguson
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• Asked why he played in a game known to be crooked, a player replied, "But it's the only game in town."
• Most of these quotes are abysmal and submitted by the sort of idiots who fill the partypoker chatbox with words like 'phuktard'
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.