10 Random Poker Quotes

• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Sometimes nothing's a pretty cool hand -paul newman-
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• I have found that when my reasoning for making a call amounts to, "Aww, fuck it." it is usually the wrong move.
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.