10 Random Poker Quotes

• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• I should have stayed home and played with myself.
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• Great poker players are separated from good poker players not by how they win their hands, but how they lose them.