10 Random Poker Quotes

• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• "Give me running 10's boy!!" Mike Laing - after CALLING 78K with 10-8 on a board of K22
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• People who play poker often wear raw hide.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• Nobody would play the game if the best hand always won. -Will Schwarz