10 Random Poker Quotes
« back to poker calculator
More Random Quotes- (after a particularly bad beat)
"that was a terrible call"
"it's called gambling"
"no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
- The greatest feeling is when you've broken your opponent's spirit & crushed his confidence. The fact that you've taken both his bankroll & the shirt off his back is just a bonus.
Tom V. (Livonia, Michigan)
- Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
- Son, when a man bets you that the jack of spades will rise out of the dwck and squirt water in your ear: son, don't take that bet, for, as sure as eggs is eggs, you'll end up with a wet ear.
- Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand.
One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
- If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
- "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
- How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
- "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
- "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker."
- Mike McDermott, "Rounders"