10 Random Poker Quotes

• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "So, what did you have?" "A pair...of balls."
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• The only thing you lose by folding is the opportunity to win.
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen