10 Random Poker Quotes

• you cannot have everything....where would you put it. (steven wright)
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• In order to live, you must be willing to die - Amir Vahedi
• "That's the best I ever misread a hand." Unknown NL holdem tourney player at Taj Mahal, December 2003, after going all in on the flop, mistakenly believing he had a flush, but rivering a flush anyway
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• "I raise, therefore I am." - Howard Lederer
• "Poker is 100% skill, 50% luck" - Phil Hellmuth
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright