10 Random Poker Quotes

• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• I have two small pair.....8's and 8's.
• Upon entering a cardroom in which a player had never before played, he asked the floorman for a 10-20 hold-em seat. The floorman dutifully put him on the list and told him that the only available seat was at 3-6 Omaha HiLo. The player quipped, "No, I don't have enough money to play limits that high."
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• "What've you got, Layne?" "You BEAT." Final table banter between Layne Flack and Mike "The Mouth" Matusow. $ 6,000 No Limit Hold'em Final Day 2004 Ultimatebet.com Poker Classic Radisson Aruba Resort & Casino, Palm Beach
• Some people ask "what could they possibly call me with" before making a bet. I don't ask that question. I just make the bet and let them supply the answer. - Action Bob
• Poker is for loners.
• "Listen, here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, then you ARE the sucker." - Mike McDermott, "Rounders"