10 Random Poker Quotes

• You have to piss with the dick you have
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• Poker is a lot like sex. Everyone thinks they know what they are doing, but only a few are actually good at it.- "Dutch" Boyd
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• I used to go out, go dancing, and talk to the chicks. Now, my life has been down-sized to the couch, the laptop, and the occasional cranberry and rum. --The 5 card stud---
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." --Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion