10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• "You get your chips your way, I'll get my chips mine." (Phil Ivey, to Howard Lederer)
• Always play hands where both hole cards are different suits. It doubles the possibility of hitting a flush. Anon.
• Frying bacon is much like playing poker; in each, a pig must be slaughtered and consumed by a superior being.
• Any two cards can lose... and they usually do.
• Where's the buffet? -Doyle Brunson
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"