10 Random Poker Quotes

• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. — Steven Wright
• Fold and live to fold again
• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe
• See AA before the flop is like a smile from the girl of your dreams, see AA lose to a pour hand on the river feels like the same chick just gave you a bad case of blue balls
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."