10 Random Poker Quotes

• Sex is good, but poker lasts longer.
• "I'm broke one day and have a fortune the next day, and I don't give a damn" --Jack "Treetop" Straus--
• I've noticed something funny ... the more I practice, the luckier I get. -- Jack Nicklaus
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• This above all else: To thine own self be true. - William Shakespeare
• "never count your money when your sitting at the table, there will be time enough for counting, when the dealings done."
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.