10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• "I want him to think that I am pondering a call, but all I'm really thinkin about it Vegas and the fuckin' Mirage." - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• A pair of Aces with a low kicker is like a chick without nipples... -doyle brunson, circa 1986
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• Overhead at a ring game during a tournament when people where discussing there bad beat knock outs etc "Ya I got knocked out of both tournies the same way....I got caught Bluffing"
• I guess if luck wasn't involved, i'd win every tournament -Phil Helmuth
• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders