10 Random Poker Quotes

• in the poker game of life women are the rake
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• If you raise with 72 offsuit, you get to raise when the flops is 7-7-2, ... once in your life. If you fold 72 offsuit, you get the free time to study your opponents or the waitresses and avoid polishing the rail with your sweater ... tough decision!
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright