10 Random Poker Quotes

• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Famous last words before he became a eunuch 'Id bet my bollocks on this hand'
• Poker is like a horse, five letters, two vowels
• "All-in, bitches!!!"
• In the game of life, women are the rake. - Worm
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• Whaddya think you're playing against- an empty chair?
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• I don't really mind getting bad beats. Of course, 9 times out of 10, my superior cards will win. But that 1 time in 10 that someone catches lucky cards and beats me, I don't get mad. Because each of the next 9 times they think they can catch something adds another inch to my television.