10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• Please screen your these quotes, most of the crap people submit here don't classify as poker quotes at all, they just express how badly those persons misunderstand the game of poker or how proud they are that they understand elemntry concepts such as "counting outs" or "pot odds", no one cares jerks
• Homer: Your mother has this crazy idea that gambling is wrong. Even though they say it's okay in the Bible. Lisa: Really? Where? Homer: Eh, somewhere in the back.
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• If it wasn't for luck, I'd win every hand.
• " The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; happens at the poker table all the time."
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• Concentrate. Don't do anything stupid. Catch some cards. ----Mrs. Cloutier, as TJ heads out to another tournament
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus