10 Random Poker Quotes

• Deal 'em, and read 'em. Ralph Malph
• Those eggs smell delicious!
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."
• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.