10 Random Poker Quotes

• some call cheating immoral, but then again, it's immoral to let a sucker keep his money.
• when a player asks me for lucky chips, i say they weren't lucky for the person i got them from
• Got married to a hand, and discovered I got set up with a she-male.
• how do you know when simon trumper has just got lucky? a bit of his hair falls out.
• "You gotta know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em." -Kenny Rogers
• "First you're a champ, then you're a chimp, then you're a chump." [I was told this was a quote from Phil Hellmuth]
• Sex is like poker. It feels better to go all in. --Jarod Kintz
• "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside. That probably sounds harsh. But that's the way it is at the poker table. If you don't believe me, then you're the lamb that's going off to the slaughter." Stu Unger, three-time WSOP Champion
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."