10 Random Poker Quotes

• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• No bad beat can withstand the assault of laughter!
• The problem with slowplaying the nuts is that there might be somebody else slowplaying a hand they only think is the nuts. -Gary Carson
• "Never say 'Whoa' to a mud puddle" -- Anonymous $4-to-go NL A-5 Lowball Table, Cameo Club Palo Alto CA, 1977
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• How can I miss the flop so bad that I don't even have a straight draw? -Jdoe