10 Random Poker Quotes

• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• Its better to have played and lost then to not have played at all Dick McWatters
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Nobody knows where the hobo goes when it snows.
• "Never go broke in an unraised pot" -T.J. Cloutier
• After taking a beat: "How bad do they play?...This is the World Series of Poker!" -Phil Hellmuth Jr.
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.