10 Random Poker Quotes

• When you're drawing dead, you always get there.
• Right now I only play online poker. If I ever play live poker, raise preflop with a good hand, get called by someone with a 52 who hits a straight, I am walking over to that person to knock out his teeth. Congratulations you idiot.
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen
• "I swear to god if you beat me and i will get my gun out of the car and kill you...and your family." -Uncle Remus
• The one who bets the most wins; cards just break ties.
• If you cant spot the fish in the first ten minutes, you are the fish.
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "The poker player learns that sometimes both science and common sense are wrong; that the bumblebee can fly; that, perhaps, one should never trust an expert; that there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of by those with an academic bent." -- David Mamet