10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• "I better straighten out my game, before I flush all my money down the toilet" - D. Drury
• Someone on here said that "poker is for fat American losers". That sounds a lot like the ramblings of a foriegn homosexual who's busy scratching a broke ass.
• When I play badly, I lose fast. When I play well, I lose slowly. In a tournament, the net result is the same: I LOSE! - RH 11-6-05
• i dont play any two suited cards. I play any two non suited cards, that way i am drawing at two different flushes
• I played poker with a real 10 last night, however on a slow night she only charges 5!
• "If you want to know what lies on the road ahead, ask the man whos on the way back" anon
• Life is a gamble at terrible odds if it was a bet you would never take it
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine