10 Random Poker Quotes

• I play like a mullet: tight up front and loose in the back.
• "if you riffle shuffle a standard deck exactly 9 times the cards will return to its original position as it were prior to the 9 riffle shuffles."
• "Why do you think the same five guys make it to the final table of the World Series of Poker EVERY YEAR? What, are they the luckiest guys in Las Vegas?" - Mike McDermott (Rounders, 1998)
• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• Dan: I got the ace too, but I have nothing to kick you with. Ian: Well, you could always take your shoe off.
• "Hold em is to stud what chess is to checkers." -- Johnny Moss
• "In the Poker Game of Life women are the rake, they are the ______ rake." -Worm
• I don't want to be called a good loser. A good loser is still a loser. -Stu Unger
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Two cowboys at table. One suddenly plunges a dagger through the hand of the other player, pinning the hand to the table. Then he says to his wounded opponent, "Sir, if that is not an ace of spades hidden beneath your hand, then I owe you an apology."