10 Random Poker Quotes

• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• Nixon financed his first political campaign with money he won playing poker against his fellow naval officers.
• If you don't want to get beat on the river, don't get in a hand with me. -- Dan Nelson
• women can't play poker cause they don't have the nuts
• (after a particularly bad beat) "that was a terrible call" "it's called gambling" "no it's called really sucking at life especially poker and trying to throw your money away because your life is useless and you have been pondering suicide for the last week but getting lucky enough to keep it"
• If you can't quit the best hand, you can't play.
• People who play poker should also try playing with sock puppets, or, in a more casual event, training ferrets. I hope this pleases fellow pokerites like it pleases me, daily. WOW im wet.
• Trying to find the odds (not percentage) for this hand. One person has JJ the other 1010. On the flop is J 10 10, what are the odds of this happening?
• Liquor up front, poker in the rear
• I've raised with cards less attractive than what's in my toilet after I took a dump in it. - Gus Hansen