10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• If you can't spot the sucker at the table, guess what..
• Poker is like masturbating. It's fun, highly addictive, and eventually gives you the feeling of getting fucked.
• Fish don't eat Nutz!
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• You should pay as much as possible for a free card.
• Play like a cunt, get fucked like one!
• What did the pocket 3's say to the pocket 2's? Your a dead duck.
• Poker is for loners.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.