10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "You can shear a sheep many times; you can skin it only once." -- Amarillo Slim
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• Acey Deucy Never Leucy --Phil Hellmuth
• I cried because I had no draw, until I met a man with no pair.
• For all you probability freaks, remember to consider the probability that an opponent is lying. Generally, liars dig holes and keep on lying, at least in the short run, as they try to climb out. Adjust your math prowess accordingly. Tells are paramount, as much or more as your calculating brain is. Poker becomes super-multi-variable when the psychological realm is joined with that already beautiful world of card probabilities. -- a mathematician
• "It's always good to get a nice dick-suckin before a tournament...it calms the senses." Alex Powers