10 Random Poker Quotes

• How do you get a professional poker player off your porch? Pay him for the pizza.
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• You have to piss with the dick you have
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• You know that you've seen a lot of poker when three people are all in before the flop, two of them turn over aces and the other turns over kings, and the king hits on the river, and you say, "I've seen that before, and ...."
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• "Not all trappers wear 'coon-skin hats."
• "There are few things that are so unpardonably neglected in our country as poker. The upper class knows very little about it. Now and then you find ambassadors who have sort of a general knowledge of the game, but the ignorance of the people is fearful. Why, I have known clergymen, good men, kind-hearted, liberal, sincere, and all that, who did not know the meaning of a "flush". It is enough to make one ashamed of the species." --Mark Twain
• Poker is for fat, American losers.