10 Random Poker Quotes

• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson
• "If the flop don't fit, you must aquit" -Matt Thornton, Dayton, Ohio
• The best thing about that hand was I wasn't in it
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• this hand sucked me in like an eagle in a jet engine
• "I guess there's nothing left but all in." -Greg Raymer
• A great poker player knows when he is playing poorly.
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.