10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen."
• " Dear Lord, help me to break even. I need the money."
• Liquor in the front, Poker in the rear.
• Most poker players agree, having sex is much akin to playing a game - both require a good hand.
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• Sometimes doing the right thing loses you money and the wrong thing gains you money. The trick is figuring the right time to do the wrong thing and the wrong time to do the right thing.
• "I guess if there weren't luck involved, I'd win every time." -Phil Hellmuth
• "The kiddie game is down the street!" - Mike "the Mouth" Matusow
• Fold and live to fold again
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"