10 Random Poker Quotes

• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Remember these three simple words and you'll never go broke........ "Stick em Up!"
• I'm too good for you, you might as well flip those 2 cards over.
• God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffible game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time. --Gaiman and Pratchett's "Good Omens"
• Poker is like petting a cat, you need some hands.
• they call it poker because the word "FUCK" was taken.
• Think of how stupid the median poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• If you lock 100 retards in a room and make them play a tournament, one of them has to win. If you do that in each state, you will produce 50 state champions. If you lock those 50 retards in a room, call it the Poker Championship of the Universe, one of them has to win, and then PokerStars gets 10%.
• Sign hanging in old time saloon: Liquor in the front, poker in the rear. -The old sage.
• "So again, do not raise in No Limit Hold'em -- especially tournaments -- if there is a reasonable chance that a reraise will make you throw up." -- David Sklansky (Tournament Poker for Advanced Players)