10 Random Poker Quotes

• "Does this look like a man beat by jacks!"-Rounders
• the perfect poker player deploys his masterful execution of logic and then litters it with chaotic sequences of lunacy.
• Think of how stupid the average poker player is. By definition, half of them are dumber than that.
• Poker is like sex - everyone thinks that they are the best at it but few actually know what they are doing - Layne Flack
• "Oh give me a break, Ace-eight! I guess some people like getting their money in as a 3-to-1 underdog." -Phil Hellmuth, at the 2004 WSOP
• When I was young, I heard that all you need is a chip and chair. Now that I am old, I realize that they weren't talking about tortilla chips.
• "I got a full house! Whatchu got, sucker?" "Gee, does that beat me? All I got is two pair: a pair-a ones...and, uh, ANUDDA pair-a ones." -Nasta Canasta & Bugs Bunny, "Barbary Coast Bunny"
• "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died." -- Steven Wright
• I can't raise it up. - Cow Jacobs
• I couldn't bet it, so I gave my Aunt $2 to make a bet for me. She didn't want me to be disappointed by losing my first bet, so she bought a show ticket. The horse won. It's been 40 years, I still havn't spoken to her again. --Gary Carson